


sharp objects

by torigates



Category: New Girl
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-22
Updated: 2013-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-05 13:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1094609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torigates/pseuds/torigates
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Schmidt gives Jess a box of Cece's things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	sharp objects

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cashewdani](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cashewdani/gifts).



There was a knock on her bedroom door, and when Jess opened it, Schmidt shoved a banker's box into her arms without waiting for a reply.

"Good," he said. "You're not naked."

He walked into the centre of her room and stood with his hands on his hips, as if surveying all her worldly possessions.

"Why would I be naked?" she asked, knowing it was a mistake but not being able to help herself.

He waved her off. "I don't know what kind of debauchery you and Nick get up to in here. I could have been walking into anything."

That was a little rich coming from Schmidt, honestly. And, "Nick's not even home!" she exclaimed.

He flapped his arm at her again, like Nick's presence or lack thereof would have little effect on her state of undress.

Jess didn't say anything, speechless.

Schmidt continued to stare at her.

Finally, Jess broke. "Are you going to explain the box?" she asked.

Schmidt stared at her. Jess stared back. After a few moments of silence she sighed and walked over to her bed, putting the box down gently and reaching for the lid.

"It's Cece's stuff!" he said before she could examine the contents.

"Okay," Jess said, drawing out the word. "Is there a reason you're giving this to me instead of returning it to its rightful owner?"

He looked uncomfortable and shifted back and forth before answering. "I wasn't sure she'd want it," he mumbled.

"Pardon?" Jess asked. It wasn't that she was _never_ going to forgive him for what he did, but the best friend code dictated that she give him as hard a time as possible for as long as Cece deemed necessary.

"I've already hurt Cece a lot," he said, and actually looked her in the eye. Jess had to admit a grudging amount of respect. "I just want to return her things--if she wants them," he told her. "Can you do that?"

Jess hesitated a moment, mostly to make him squirm, before nodding. "Sure," she said. "I can do that."

 

-

 

It was almost an accident that she found the papers at all. Jess debated whether or not to tell Cece that Schmidt have given Jess a bunch of her stuff. Jess could have just as easily chucked the whole box into the back of her closet, and forgot about it. If there were something that Cece really couldn't live without, she would have asked Jess to steal it back for her by now.

Eventually Jess decided to just tell Cece about it and see what she wanted to do.

"Schmidt gave me a box of your shit," she said, over lunch one day. Cece stopped by the school on Jess' break so the two of them could catch up. It was a little strained around the loft these days, and Jess couldn't blame Cece for wanting to avoid it as much as possible.

Cece stopped chewing mid bite.

"I wasn't sure whether or not I should give it to you, or hide in the back of my closet," she said. "And I figured you would have told me if there was some kind of family heirloom or whatever, but I didn't want to just ignore it in case you wanted it so I'm just telling you I have this box and if you want it I'll give it to you and if you don't I'll take care of it."

Cece looked at her for a long moment, a reluctantly fond look on her face. "Family heirloom?" she asked eventually.

Jess laughed. "Well, I don't know!"

Cece laughed too, and that was a good sign. She hadn't been laughing enough lately.

"Okay," Jess told her when their giggles had died down. "I'll go through it."

Cece nodded. "Thanks."

Jess waited until Nick was at work before examining the contents of Cece's box. It wasn't that she didn't trust him to do this with her, but no, that was exactly it. They had been through a lot in the relationship, a lot of heavy things, and she knew that Nick would come through in a crunch. This wasn't exactly a crunch, and besides, Nick was the worst secret keeper Jess had ever met in her entire life, and a good portion of her day was spent with small children. She wasn't sure what exactly Schmidt deemed "keepable" of the stuff Cece could have left behind, but in case there was something embarrassing, it was better for everyone if Nick could still look her in the eye.

The box itself turned out to be a bit of a letdown. There were a couple t-shirts Cece had likely slept in, a few more bras that Jess had to assume Schmidt tried to commandeer, a few DVDs, and a pair of panties Jess _knew_ did not belong to Cece (what? they were best friends, Jess had seen the inside of her underwear drawer). She tossed those, which left only what appeared to be a bunch of old bills cluttering the bottom of the box.

Jess was about to dump the lot of it into the trash, but at the last moment she thought better of it. She gathered up the papers and began to sort through them. There were a few movie ticket stubs, plus a receipt for a Chinese restaurant in the outskirts of LA of all places, along with what Jess imagined were souvenirs from other dates the two of them must have gone on.

At the very bottom, underneath everything, and crinkled up as if it had balled up and then smoothed back out. Upon inspection Jess saw that it was a receipt from a company called "Sky High Writing & Design."

The bill cheerfully proclaimed, "THANK YOU FOR YOUR PAYMENT. Your Message: MARRY ME, will be delivered on April 17, 2012." With a summary of (pretty substantial) charges showing payment in full at the bottom.

Jess stared at it in stunned disbelief. She knew where she had been in April 2012. Dating Russell. Which meant that Schmidt's sky writing proposal corresponded exactly with Cece's pregnancy scare.

Had he really gone through with it? Did Cece _see_ it? How come Jess never heard anything about this before?

She collapsed backwards onto her bed and bounced a few times.

And of course there was the most important question: what the fuck was she supposed to do about it now?

In the end, Jess pulled out the DVDs to return to Cece, and left the rest in the box and stored it in the back of her closet. Who knew, maybe one of them would want the memories one day, and Jess wasn't going to be the one to throw them away like they were nothing.

Still, she couldn't stop thinking about that crumpled up receipt, and what it meant.

Schmidt was going to propose. Maybe he even went through with it. Jess wondered if Cece knew about it, if she had seen his proposal and turned him down, or if Schmidt had lost his nerve at the last moment, or maybe he hadn't and Cece... Jess didn't know, and she didn't want to ask Cece in case she _didn't_ know about it and bringing it up would only hurt her more, but she also didn't want to ask Schmidt because she was still really mad at him.

She had to talk to someone about it.

"What's wrong?" Nick asked her.

It was the next day and they were lying in her bed. He was propped up on his elbows, and they were making out. Or at least he was attempting to make out with her, Jess could admit that she wasn't giving it her full attention.

"Ugh," Jess said, and threw her head back. "I have a secret."

Nick was off the bed and across the room faster than she could register. "Don't tell me!" he said. His hands were up, hovering around his ears like he was prepared to block out her voice at a moment's notice.

"I _know_ ," she said.

He visibly deflated. "You know I can't keep a secret," he said. "Why would you scare me like that?"

She flopped back down on the bed, listening as Nick walked more sedately across the room to join her.

"I have _never_ seen you move that quickly," she said when he was lying down next to her.

He nodded.

"I mean," she said. "Not even for sex. I didn't even know you could move that fast."

He didn't say anything.

She looked over at him.

"What?" he said. "I _can't keep a secret_ ," he said. "You know that. _Everyone_ knows that, and still people are going around telling me secrets and then my back doesn't stop sweating until I let it all out and my stomach hurts and I get ulcers, and I don't have health insurance!"

Jess lifted herself up onto her elbow and stared down at him.

"Not even for a blow job have I seen you moved that quickly," she said mildly.

"Are you offering a blow job?" he asked, perking up a little bit.

Jess considered whether or not she wanted to continue this conversation, and decided it probably wasn't worth her time or effort.

She shrugged. "Sure. Why not?"

 

-

 

Winston was watching television, sprawled out over most of the couch. His cat was sitting on the other end.

Jess moved to sit down next to the cat, who hissed at her.

"Ferguson’'s sitting there," he said without taking his eyes off the television.

"Oh," Jess said. "Sorry, Ferguson."

Winston looked placated, and so, strangely enough, did the cat.

She shifted her weight from foot to foot. "Can I sit down?" she asked. "I need to talk to you about something."

He finally looked over to her. He stared for a long moment, before reaching out and pulling the cat onto his lap, leaving room for Jess to sit down on the couch.

She sat.

He stared at her and scratched behind Ferguson’s ears, not paying any particular attention to Jess. She wasn’t sure how to broach the subject, and the two of them sat in silence. 

“You said you wanted to talk?” Winston asked after a while. 

“Yeah,” Jess said. 

“Are you planning on doing so?” he asked. 

She nodded. “Yep, sure am.” 

More silence. 

“Any time soon?” 

She looked over at him. He was relaxed on the couch, his cat comfortably settled in his lap, and she wondered if she had the right to burden this secret on someone who wasn’t Cece or Schmidt. But she wanted--needed--desperately to talk to someone about it. The words were bubbling up inside her chest, and she knew she had to let them out in a safe environment otherwise she’d end up spilling the beans at a completely inopportune moment like she was Nick or something. 

“I’m thinking about it,” she said seriously. 

He nodded. “Okay. You do that.” 

They watched an episode of _Dancing with the Stars_ in almost complete silence. It wasn’t until Tom Bergeron was telling viewers not to forget to vote that she found her voice. 

“Say you found out something that you don’t think you’re supposed to know about something that someone did, but it was a long time ago and you’re not even sure if it happened or if it happened if it even matters anymore, what would you do?” she asked. She shifted on the couch so her feet were tucked up underneath her and turned to face Winston. 

He stared at her for a long moment. “I’m sorry,” he said eventually. Was that supposed to be English?” 

She groaned. “I found something out,” she said. “And I’m not sure what to do about it.” 

“That is somehow even _less_ helpful than the gibberish you spewed before,” he told her. 

“I know,” she said. “I’m just not sure how much I can or should say, but I’m afraid if I don’t talk to someone about it I’ll be Nick and I don’t want to be Nick, Winston. I don’t!” She punched the cushion for emphasis. 

He nodded seriously. “No one does,” he said. 

“Exactly,” she told him. “You get it.” 

He shook his head. “I really don’t.” 

“Ugh, I wish I knew what was the right thing to do.” 

“Listen, Jess,” he said seriously. “I don’t know what’s going on with…all that” he waived his hand in a circle in front of Jess’ face. “But all you or any of us can do is our best.” 

She nodded. 

“And for god’s sake try to express yourself better, aren’t you supposed to be an educator? I fear for the next generation if that’s what they have to work with.” 

Jess tried to work up some indignation, but he really kind of had a point. 

“Thanks, Winston,” she said. “I mean, not for insulting my life’s work, that kind of makes you the worst, but for the rest of it. I appreciate it.” 

“Good,” he said nodding. “Because I have no idea what I was talking about.” 

“That makes two of us, I guess,” she said. 

They watched two more episodes of _Dancing with the Stars_. It was nice. 

 

-

 

"I went through the box," Jess said, sitting down at the kitchen table next to Schmidt.

He looked at her.

"Cece's box," she clarified needlessly.

He nodded, and looked her in the eye. Jess was suddenly aware that Schmidt knew exactly what was in that box. That he have given the box with the hope that she--or more likely Cece--would go through it and find that receipt. That it was his way of asking for some sort of penance, or perhaps forgiveness. And Jess wanted to forgive him, she wanted to be able to give him that peace of mind, to let him stop hurting. But she also knew that she wasn't ready to do it, might never be. Besides, it wasn't really her place to offer forgiveness.

"I asked her if she wanted the stuff back," Jess said haltingly. "She said no. I'm sorry, Schmidt, she doesn't want it."

He nodded, but didn't say anything. She reached out and put her hand over his. They sat together quietly for a long time.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m sorry it’s kind of depressing, I hope it doesn’t upset you too much on Christmas. I wanted to make it more hopeful, but I’m finding it really hard to find any compassion or sympathy in my heart for Schmidt these days. I think he does truly regret what he did, but it’s hard to feel for him when he doesn’t seem to want to take any responsibility for his own actions. I tried to show something that would allow for that door to be reopened again the future once more healing had happened, but who knows how successful I was. I hope you enjoyed nonetheless!


End file.
